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Author Topic: Favorite student sentences, infinity edition  (Read 2290 times)
melba_frilkins
Doing laundry.
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« on: January 31, 2017, 5:41:33 pm »

This topic has always gotten a new thread each semester. Is there a particular reason for that?

So, I'm starting this thread for student sentences: Spring 2017 and beyond. If anyone disagrees they can, well, start their own thread.

Favorite sentence so far:

I did not want to have the responsibility of potentially hurting someone, so I decided I wanted to pursue my long time dream of becoming a medical examiner.

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melba_frilkins
Doing laundry.
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« Reply #1 on: February 01, 2017, 6:50:26 pm »

Oh wait, same assignment, even more favorite:

I want to be a brain sergeant
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miss_jane_marple
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I prefer the chocolates


« Reply #2 on: February 01, 2017, 6:53:59 pm »

Oh wait, same assignment, even more favorite:

I want to be a brain sergeant

I understand this is a growth industry as of January 20, 2017. Student needs to get some applications out there.
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I just don't have time for reality right now.
chemigal
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« Reply #3 on: February 02, 2017, 1:59:23 pm »

An extensive property is when an element can go beyond its basic functions.

Same exam, different student:

Extensive property is a property that extends to the highest point of matter.

Maybe I could start a hybrid chemistry/philosophy course?  What is the highest point of matter?  Can we go beyond our basic functions as elements?  How many barium atoms fit on the head of a pin?

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amlithist
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« Reply #4 on: February 07, 2017, 6:52:15 pm »

Part of a Comp II (Comp II !) "This I Believe" essay:

[Once you have a college degree] People will see you’re well decanted and have knowledge.

This made about the most sense of any of the 600 words she wrote. And she wants to be a nurse. 

I'll be doing my part to crush that dream.  Sorry.  Somebody has to.
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Every person you meet is fighting a battle you know nothing about.  Be kind, always.
ratguy
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« Reply #5 on: February 07, 2017, 6:57:58 pm »

Part of a Comp II (Comp II !) "This I Believe" essay:

[Once you have a college degree] People will see you’re well decanted and have knowledge.


David Mitchell has a novel in which the villains drain the life force out of their victims by a process known as "decanting." I choose to believe that this student is describing that experience.
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cmeagher7
Spending way too much time on the fora if I am now a
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« Reply #6 on: February 07, 2017, 10:21:40 pm »

Part of a Comp II (Comp II !) "This I Believe" essay:

[Once you have a college degree] People will see you’re well decanted and have knowledge.

This made about the most sense of any of the 600 words she wrote. And she wants to be a nurse. 

I'll be doing my part to crush that dream.  Sorry.  Somebody has to.

Maybe she has been reading Brave New World and doesn't quite understand how birth actually works?
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Quote
Quote
That thread is gonna be a train wreck.

Oh yeah, that's not going to go well.  (I was surprised at how quickly I realized which thread it was).
grit_1645
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« Reply #7 on: February 08, 2017, 4:25:14 pm »

Quote from: amlithist
Part of a Comp II (Comp II !) "This I Believe" essay:

[Once you have a college degree] People will see you’re well decanted and have knowledge.

This made about the most sense of any of the 600 words she wrote. And she wants to be a nurse.

I'll be doing my part to crush that dream.  Sorry.  Somebody has to.
To be honest, I think this might have been a spellcheck auto correct for "educated".  Not to say Stu shouldn't reread what she has just written....
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cathwen
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« Reply #8 on: February 08, 2017, 6:19:34 pm »

Spellcheck autocorrect gone wrong seems a good explanation for decanted.

Meanwhile, here's a sentence from this week's quiz:
The Catholic Church accused the Cathars of hearsay.

Such gossips, those Cathars...   
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yellowtractor
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« Reply #9 on: February 08, 2017, 6:42:00 pm »

Meanwhile, here's a sentence from this week's quiz:
The Catholic Church accused the Cathars of hearsay.

Such gossips, those Cathars...   

I like this very much and would probably offer extra credit for it--after grilling the student for his or her sources, and concerning the implications of this startling claim, in office hours.
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It is, of course, possible that what I remember as terror was only a love too great to bear.
mamselle
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« Reply #10 on: February 11, 2017, 5:25:52 pm »

Spellcheck autocorrect gone wrong seems a good explanation for decanted.

Meanwhile, here's a sentence from this week's quiz:
The Catholic Church accused the Cathars of hearsay.

Such gossips, those Cathars...   

Actually, Kienzle (Women as Preachers and Prophets, HUP, and "Preaching the Cross," ) and Hamberger ("Nuns as Artists") might have agreed with your student...there's also an exhibition catalogue they co-authored on the Cathars and the Albigensians awhile back, see if I can find it....)
;--)
M.

   
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fishprof
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« Reply #11 on: February 17, 2017, 12:52:40 pm »

Part of a Comp II (Comp II !) "This I Believe" essay:

[Once you have a college degree] People will see you’re well decanted and have knowledge.


David Mitchell has a novel in which the villains drain the life force out of their victims by a process known as "decanting." I choose to believe that this student is describing that experience.

In Tank Girl, the forcible extraction of water from the body could fit the decanting idea as well.
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"Before I hand back your exams, I'd just like to say how refreshing it is in this modern era to see that most students still don't give a damn about grades."
amlithist
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« Reply #12 on: February 19, 2017, 11:45:43 am »

"Education without value is like a lazy person eating salad."

That was all--not even an attempt at explaining or clarifying or contextualizing.  (Comp II, by the way.)
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Every person you meet is fighting a battle you know nothing about.  Be kind, always.
geoteo
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« Reply #13 on: February 19, 2017, 11:52:25 am »

"Education without value is like a lazy person eating salad."

I love this--it has a classic timelessness that meshes nicely with humanity's endless quest for non-stick cookware.
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"The accession of this dynamic pavement collapses the cranium of the community because of its elegance."
"Since the beginning of time, mankind has yearned for non-stick cookware."
geonerd
Limerick cretin, Editor in Chief, Journal of Non-Rhyming Things Unlearned and a
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Do not take the bait.


« Reply #14 on: February 19, 2017, 9:36:01 pm »

Can I HoF and tagline every entry on this thread?
Thank you all for making me laugh. I needed that.
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I find it surprising that people are surprised.
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