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A Gay, African-American Urbanite Finds a Home in Rural Iowa

By  Raynard S. Kington
September 23, 2018

Shortly before our family moved from Washington, D.C., to Iowa, we went on a four-week vacation in Greece. In an effort to prepare our sons for the long return trip, we described the journey involving cars, airplanes, and an overnight ferry that would take us “home to America.”

After we moved to Iowa, and our older son, then 4, had spent a few days at his new day-care center, I asked how things were so far at the preschool. He asked, “When are we going home to America?”

His conclusion was not unlike one drawn by many people around the country: Rural Iowa, even in a college town, is so different from any big city that it might as well be a foreign country.

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Shortly before our family moved from Washington, D.C., to Iowa, we went on a four-week vacation in Greece. In an effort to prepare our sons for the long return trip, we described the journey involving cars, airplanes, and an overnight ferry that would take us “home to America.”

After we moved to Iowa, and our older son, then 4, had spent a few days at his new day-care center, I asked how things were so far at the preschool. He asked, “When are we going home to America?”

His conclusion was not unlike one drawn by many people around the country: Rural Iowa, even in a college town, is so different from any big city that it might as well be a foreign country.

2018 Diversity in academe Cover
Location, Location, Location: The Geographic-Diversity Issue
In this special report, we look at diversity through a somewhat novel lens — that of geography. Our coverage examines how a college’s location affects its mission, its ability to recruit students and faculty members, and its campus culture.
  • At This Rural Vermont College, Students and Staff Members Get a Vote
  • How Do Rural Colleges Attract Students? Safety and Scenery, to Begin With
  • ‘A Little Slice of Paradise’ to Study
  • Hard Questions About Diversity, Honest Answers
  • Diversity Fatigue Is Real

Because I am a gay, African-American man in an interracial marriage with kids, perhaps we were seen as expatriates of a sort, viewed with skepticism or shock by those we left behind for choosing to leave a familiar urban American center, and greeted with uncertainty or suspicion by those in this part of America. I wondered if Iowans would treat us as outsiders and hold us at arm’s length. But my time here has brought a new meaning to that expression. In my previous life, “arm’s length” meant a significant degree of separation, while now, in my rural life, it means the closeness of almost every person to one another. It means welcoming newcomers to town, connecting on a personal level, looking people in the eye and speaking with them — in other words, Iowa nice.

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Reaching back to its roots as a center for abolitionist activity, Grinnell College has a richly deserved reputation as a progressive, tolerant, and welcoming academic community. Our place in the local community exists at the intersection of worlds that can at times reflect broader issues of conflict polarizing our deeply divided nation. These worlds are stereotypically characterized as irreconcilable opposites, us-versus-them in every way: political affiliation, education level, religion, class, race, ethnicity, gender identity, sexual orientation, language spoken, country of origin, immigrant status, age. But it’s harder for these seemingly opposing worlds to demonize each other at this intersection, since we’re neighbors out here in rural Iowa. These are the kinds of local relationships we should build on to help heal our country’s deep divisions. And we should find more ways to build on them.

Still, for prospective Grinnell students, it can be hard to shake the rural-as-foreign misconceptions. Kumail Nanjiani, an alumnus, touched upon that in his recent commencement address on campus, saying that even as an international student, he thought Grinnell seemed like a place separate from America. Yet, despite having been unprepared for life here, he said, “This little liberal-arts college in the middle of Iowa changed the way I saw the entire world. Before America was my home, Iowa was my home.”

Grinnell College coexists and connects with Grinnell, Iowa rather than existing separately from it. We provide students and faculty members with opportunities to interact with the rural community that surrounds the college, and to embrace socioeconomic, multicultural, and intellectual differences. We invite the community to the campus: Almost all events are open to the public. High-school students can take classes here. Through AmeriCorps programs, volunteer opportunities, and town-college joint programming, we encourage our students and faculty members to get into the community in meaningful ways.

There are challenges in recruiting faculty members to a small rural town, but fewer than you might think. We have the greatest challenges with single, young faculty members of color who wonder about their ability to find a partner in a small rural town, or with faculty members of color who bring along families. They worry both about their children’s experience being the only or one of few kids of color in their classrooms and about whether they will regret not providing their kids with deep exposure to life in their own racial or ethnic community — the rhythm of speech, food, religious and cultural experiences. My spouse and I have worked hard to make sure our kids have deep exposure to the specific worlds that shaped each of our childhoods, but we, too, wonder if what we do is enough.

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There is no question that the range of cultural experiences here in rural Iowa is narrower than in any big city, but it would be a mistake to think that this is a cultural wasteland. Grinnell has a vibrant arts center, hosting international performers, and an excellent gallery program with regular art shows, many with items from collections around the country and the world. We have an outstanding writing program here at the college, and each year we are amazed at the number of leading writers we meet and interact with. We may have fewer options than at a big university, but we take advantage of them more often and appreciate what is available to us.

Living in a small, rural college town is not what it was even 20 years ago. The impact of Amazon Prime and other services, as well as online access to news and commentary, has fundamentally changed the rural experience. Still, differences persist; the lack of racial and ethnic diversity in some rural communities, including Grinnell, is particularly apparent.

Even so, this rural culture gives us an opportunity to bring together and celebrate diverse perspectives. To immerse ourselves in something “foreign.” To challenge ourselves to be more open to ideas and experiences. More empathetic. More civil.

Eight years after moving to Iowa, our sons now have, among others, both African-American and Iowan identities; the two are not incompatible.

At the core of our son’s simple question after our move was a more profound question: Do we really belong here? And we do — this small, rural college town and its surrounding region is one of the many Americas that make up these United States, and we can choose to belong to almost any of them. The most important parts of the human experience are remarkably similar across time and geography, and each of those Americas contains within it the capacity for understanding and ignorance, growth and stagnation, inclusivity and exclusivity, neighborly love and xenophobic hate. Our Grinnell community experience in rural America has shown far more of the positive and hopeful side. I hope that is what our children learn from growing up in this small town in central Iowa.

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Raynard S. Kington is president of Grinnell College.

A version of this article appeared in the September 28, 2018, issue.
Read other items in this Location, Location, Location: The Geographic-Diversity Issue package.
We welcome your thoughts and questions about this article. Please email the editors or submit a letter for publication.
Diversity, Equity, & Inclusion
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